I’m Back And Hobbling For A Reason

Though I’ve been absent, my brain has been mulling. Churning to the point where I can no longer avoid talking to you because of some bad experience blogging for an internet marketing business that’s not worth it’s weight in chewed on Styrofoam cups.

 

UNPAID INTERNSHIPS = FREE LABOR at least in my case

(also my right hand kinda goes cold and numb if I type too long. Boo for that.) Regardless I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m letting that crap hold me back from doing something I actually love. Write, even if just for the hell of it.

So much has changed since last we spoke!

  • I’ve moved into the best apartment ever in Andersonville, Chicago, with the most fabulous landlord that wears sparkly earmuffs and Monkee’s tshirts. She’s fantastic.
  • I have new doctors actually making an effort to figure me out. Crackly mold lungs, super sleepiness, short term memory loss, numb right hand etc, all on the table for dissection. (edit: Both my shoulders are jacked up making it hard to type for very long… so blogs might take a min as I have to stop every time I can no longer feel my fingers. Just saying.)

    milwaukee trip '14

    Coors brew plant. Not all our drinks, I swear.

  • Have the best boyfriend ever. Ever. My mother calls him a gift from God even though she hasn’t met him yet.
  • I’m learning a lot about the needs of the communities on Chicago’s South Side and developing ideas to help give the youth there a voice of their own outside their limited environment.
  • Oh, and I learned to knit. It’s fun, and I give most of it away to kids who needed some warmth during this last year’s polar vortex crap. Seriously, my hair froze.

The point is, I’m back. I love this and I love talking with you, so I don’t intend on going anywhere soon.

Next blog, trying to save my friend from death by selling everything I make on Etsy. It’s a thought right?

so this is something I make pretty frequently.

so this is something I make pretty frequently.

 

Let me know what you think about that last thing, or if you have a physical therapist that accepts Medicaid. Seriously. 

I need input. Talk to me people.

Weirdness and best intentions.

Annalise

“No one has ever become poor by giving.”
― Anne Frankdiary of Anne Frank

Mice and Headless Penguins

It has been few days since any real posting of mine. My schedule filled up with all kinds of animals to look after this weekend and once I got home and showered off all the accumulated disgusting, I wasn’t exactly focused enough to type things for fun. But I’m back, and here is what I did in my slightly dazed state.

Late last week I decided to try a pattern I found online for a sort of standing/sitting mouse toy for the cats. Since they love their other mice and fish so much I figured why not! But instead of a cute little mouse catnip toy I ended up with this:

The Headless Penguin

The Headless Penguin

THE HEADLESS PENGUIN, as he is now endearingly known in this household, is a big hit with the kittens, but a huge failure when it comes to actually being a mouse (of any recognizable shape or even abstract form).

At that point I threw the Headless Penguin into the cat toy basket and became determined to create a template for a mouse that when sewn together is recognizable. So, while decompressing from taking care of a load of cats all over the city (one of which acts like she needs an exorcist every time I enter her house), I toyed with how to fix the penguin problem and finally came up with this little guy,  and an easy pattern with instructions right on it to share with you.

he's a little goofy looking, but who's not?

He’s a little silly in the face, I realize this, and can definitely be toyed around with a bit (bigger ears, 3D arms, etc), but at least he has a full body and head. I apologize that he’s in all black. I’m running seriously low on anything with color in it. The fabric store is a little difficult to get to, and so is money at this point, so black is back for now.

Here’s the pattern to print in case you want one of these littles all your own.

standing mouse templateHere’s What You Need for the project

  • Felt in whatever color strikes your fancy
  • embroidery thread
  • stuffing of your choice
  • scissors, pins, needle
  • your favorite show to keep your brain busy while you piece it all together. Personally, the mouse took me about an episode of Supernatural. I’m going to miss those boys when it’s over.

It’s that easy. Simmy, my cat, wouldn’t wake up long enough to model it for me, so I used him as a cute platform with which to display my end result.

IMAG3155-1

Don’t feel too bad for him, he threw up in my hair about 2 hours later.

“There are still many more days of failure ahead, whole seasons of failure, things will go terribly wrong, you will have huge disappointments, but you have to prepare for that, you have to expect it and be resolute and follow your own path.”
Anton Chekhov

Patience and Dirty Pennies

It’s a virtue right? I learned them all in third grade (yea parochial school…)Patience-is-a-Virtue

It would be easy to say I know a lot about patience, and then tell you that its development definitely has a payoff, and that I am now at some great job with great opportunities for growth because I’ve spent years gaining experience in something that can only be learned. But it isn’t true. I’m not at that great job I know I could do better than the next guy. I’m not writing copy for a progressive media company or marketing firm. I take care of animals, and not enough of them to meet a basic wage let alone live comfortably. What’s true here is that I have developed a capacity for patience, and it has taken more than just time.

I am not always the greatest of people. I have been mean. I have been stubborn. I have gotten easily frustrated, been quick to anger and neglectful with forgiveness. I don’t sit atop a hill thinking I have something to teach anyone. I’m pretty sure that’s not my role. As of semi-recently, through acquiring patience, I have found that I am here to quietly listen and help.

I know the feeling kid.

I know the feeling kid.

“Why is that homeless man yelling?”

“What the crap are these people talking about?”

“Your stupid dog tried to bite me!”

“That old lady has lost her mind, just ignore what she’s saying.”

“This is outrageously annoying. I hate people. Get me out of here.”

“I’ll always fail, won’t I?”

“I wish she would control her children/ walk faster/ calm down/ speak up.”

The list of things we say, ALL THE TIME, goes on and on. I’m not writing this to make you feel guilty. Far from it. I just think that some things are worth an extra moment of open inspection.

run children!

The Lawrence Welk Show!

In 2007 I began a series of jobs that forced a change in my attitude. I, for no reason whatsoever, became a caregiver at an assisted living facility. My only relevant experience at the time was watching my grandmother go, and seeing the help she received in that process. It was a suck-it-up-these-people-need-you-now-so-learn-fast sort of deal. They need you even if they tell you they don’t, that you are a fat cow, that you stole their money and then threaten or act on physical violence towards you. It doesn’t matter. Fast forward 50 years, and that’s you. Not much use in denying that sort of mental deterioration or that the years will always take their toll.

I learned what they needed, how to talk to them and eventually help some of their worried children understand them too. After less than a year I didn’t have as many residents as I had people dear to me that I still think about and hope the best for. Reality is at least half of them are gone by now, but I appreciate them still. My sweet War Heroes, my devious English Teachers, my Giants of Industry who swooned over Elvis and made me watch reruns of Lawrence Welk (Those short skirts! Scandalous! ) Their basic skills were gone, some of them yelled things like “PURPLE!”  when they were frustrated, but they were somehow aware and very much alive.

Then I moved on to animal care. Patients who couldn’t talk with anything but their body language, claws and  teeth. I love my animals, but sometimes I really hated everyone else’s.

guess which one is closest to what working at an animal hospital is actually like.

Guess which one is more realistic…

Woman Rubbing Noses with PuppyAt best, most were defensive in a hospital environment. Yet who can blame them? They are hurt and/or scared. They are angry because where they come from they were taught to be. Still, without understanding, they are put down and out of mind the moment they have a bit of medical trouble or act out by peeing on a blanket.

I once was asked to “get this done as quickly as possible because there’s only 15 min. on the meter.” Don’t be shocked, more than a few people can’t be bothered to deal with daily shots or weekly sub-q fluids. If their kid got scratched or a neighbor got bit, priorities are weighed.  Sometimes it’s asking too much. So the kid pulled a tail or the neighbor startled the dog by sticking a hand in its face or over its head, and not taking a moment to see how uncomfortable the animal became. It’s an aggressive animal in a fragile environment, period. I get it. There are other options, but I do get it.

Learning patience is trying and difficult to say the least. I have been bitten and scratched by animal and human alike (It hurts more with people if you would believe it. More bacteria too, which means worse infections).


So why am I talking about this? Tomorrow I am headed to an interview that may help shape my future in a way that I have actually hoped for. I have been disappointed before when it comes to over inflated expectations. I get a little gung ho and start planning my entire life after one glimmer of hope ahead. That glimmer often times ends up being a shiny gum wrapper or at best, a worn penny tail side up. I am talking about this because tomorrow as I head down to River North, and even right now as I sit here, I have to remind myself to have patience. This may or may not be it. I may or may not take this path. No matter what, with patience I can still retain hope.
 worse infections). There are countless failures. You find yourself inadequate and judge harshly every time you can’t succeed and feel better, somehow accomplished. Feel you’re making some progress. You start forcing yourself to understand people and things you would never want to. Sometimes you do this only for your mental survival. Those you find to be at their worst, or out of your comprehensive reach, then become much more familiar as understanding goes. That’s your pay off I suppose. Empathy. Not a better situation for yourself, not really, but a window into the separate and solitary minds around you.

I have developed a strange habit. When coming upon a penny in the street tail up, I reach down and turn it over so that someone after me can find it and smile. I know it’s silly, but there is still something in a lucky penny that nostalgia clings to. Patience tells me that even if I don’t end up where I thought, I can believe that with a tiny bit of hopeful patience to keep them going, they might find something even better.

penny

Sad Cat Diary

Dear Diary,
My human captors do not understand that when I pee on their dirty clothing, it is in effort to help them keep it off the floor and in the basket where it belongs. I have only had negative feedback for this action. I fear that they are truly the dirty apes I had suspected them to be.

Kitty Bloger

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Goldfish Toys For All!

Ok, really the toy is just for cats. I made mine for my little 9-year-old Grey Davis who has been rolling around with it since I finished the last few stitcIsn't she sweethes.  I also made a bird, but it looks a little odd, so I’ll have to improve upon it before exposing it to the world.

Anyway, I still have an excess of felt laying around that I’m trying to craftify my way through, so I found this template at My Fantastic Toy blog after searching for a while online. The only thing I didn’t appreciate about it was the format. The patterns are overlapping, so you have to print two of them in order to get the full pattern. It doesn’t so much effect the fish, but with the other patterns on the site it does make a difference.

fish template My plethora of felt does not include gold, so my fishie is black and pink, but I’m not into giving staunch boundaries and parameters to creative efforts, so do what makes you happy.

HERE’S WHAT YOU’LL NEED:

  • Felt in whatever colors you choose
  • embroidery floss
  • scissors, needle and pins

    Ladder Stitch

    Ladder Stitch

  • stuffing (cotton balls work too)
  • catnip (optional)
  • eyes to be sewn on (not recommended*)

*I don’t really think that adding the eyes is exactly a great idea. Working with animals for so long, I’ve seen some strange things get swallowed by cats and dogs alike (ex. golf balls, crunchy toys, gorilla glue, etc). Depblack and pink fishieending on how the item decides to go through (or get stuck), the vet trip ends up being an expensive one. 

HERE’S WHAT YOU DO:

  • First you’re going to put one of the sides and the bottom together, and pin a side together right side in then sew a ladder stitch nose to tail. (I didn’t like any of the ladder stitch images I found, so I made my own for you above in case you need a reference)
  • Then pin the other side and the bottom together, right side in still, and stitch from tail to nose.
  • Turn right side out and continue your ladder stitch half way over the top of the two sides leaving enough space to stuff later on.
  • At this point grab one of your fins and attach one to each side securely with the same ladder stitch. This stitch is great because when pulled tight it is barely, if at all, visible from the outside.
  • Next add your stuffing until full. It’s also possible to use the catnip alone as the stuffing making is more smushy like sand than fluffy, which some kitties really like to chew on. I did about half and half since I’m running low.
  • Finally finish stitching up and over the back to the tail and tie a knot with the thread around one of the last seams. You can hide the knot after by pulling it through to the inside, poking the needle through the opposite side and cutting it so your ends are hidden.
  • I used the embroidery floss to make circles for eyes with a chain stitch in place of any sort of button or added eye for safety.

Now you have a fish to give your little friends!

IMAG2942

Japanese goldfish,

With your gossamer tail,

You are the loveliest creature

I have ever seen.”

“Japanese kitten,

Put your tongue back in where it belongs

And go away.

I know exactly what you are thinking.” 
― Paul GallicoHonorable Cat